Weird Things About Me

Nostalgia came back when my bffs from high school came to visit me. Weird things that I realized that happened to me are

I took ownership of the color pink. I wore pink so often that pink became synonymous with my name. Ex. Oh that is a nice Sanita shirt you have on there. It's weird, but true.

Last year I accidentally signed up as a cancer patient for the relay for life at my school. I still get emails congratulating me on my survival.

Wicked Pisser

I wish I could obviate my awkwardness.

Thoughts

Everyday I wake up thinking that today will be a different day. A special day that I will finally change as a person and be who I want to be.

Two Doves by Dirty Projectors

I have fallen head over heels in love with this song. I like to retype lyrics or pieces of writing pretending that they are my own pieces of work. Mostly trying to understand what it would be like to write such a beautiful piece and wish that it would some how inspire me to do the same.

Two Doves
by Dirty Projectors

Geranium kisser
skin like silk and face like glass
don't confront me with my failure
kiss me with your mouth open
for your love better than wine
for your cologne is really fragrant

call on me, call on me, call on me

your hair is like an eagle
your two eyes are like two doves
but our bed is like a failure
all day up in the valley
at the waning of the light
to the chamber that conceive me

call on me, call on me, call on me

geranium killer
throat of soil
and my life stone
please don't defend the silver lining
around the halo that is already shining
and all the planets are aligning
for an afternoon that's never ending

call on me, call on me, call on me

Refwecting

Well I find myself back here again. I mean when you have pneumonia, you are basically housebound to 'rest and drink fluids.' I don't think I'm very good at resting. I'm too much of a girl on the go go go! As much as I complain and sometimes wish I was the way I used to be. I know that I don't want to be the person that I used to be, but there are things that I did that I miss. I know that I'm not perfect and I have a far way to go to be the person that I ideally would want to be. I also know that I hold human kind to be at a high standard and sometimes I wonder if I hold it a bit high because most times it makes me seem like a proud person. It really makes me seem like I'm prejudice, but its just that I believe that I won't like it, but I suppose that I can't really say it unless I try it. BUT I'm trying to try?

Things I miss:
I miss reading for leisure.
I miss reading and writing poetry.
I miss doing volunteer work.

Things I'm happy about:
Pursing a degree that I'm excited about
Being more relaxed and carefree
Getting out of my comfort zone

But there is a story that I must tell. My friend, Mallory told me about an event that happened in her business class. Her class was raising money for a charity that the class would collectively donate to and everyone was throwing out organizations to donate to. So the class was arguing as usual all the sororities were throwing in their organizations and there is one that our entire campus usually contributes to. Well essentially it ended up that the organizations it came down to were two smaller ones and some girl had the audacity to insult and demean these organizations because it didn't support her big organization! I was absolutely disgusted to hear that someone really had the nerve to insult another non-for-profit organization as if it were a bad cause. I was just really confused at that. Can't we just agree that the money is going for a good cause? It's just absolutely absurd to me. Everyone has a cause in their life and for you to attack someone else's cause just blows my mind. I know you may not agree with it, but don't attack it. They are just trying to make a difference just as much as you are.

Well it's probably just me being a Buddhist. Speaking of, I have lost my necklace charm that I wrote about in a past post. I'm actually really bummed about it, but I suppose it just makes me focus my spirituality more on myself than an idol around my neck.